Ang Buhay nga Naman (Re-written)

 

Ang Buhay nga Naman (Re-written)

Just a few thoughts, jokes, and random musings.

You know, I’ve always loved sharing a good joke. I truly believe a solid laugh can completely turn your day around. Laughter really is the best exercise! I was looking through my old Tag-lish journal, Ang Buhay nga Naman, and found a bunch of jokes I wrote and collected back then. Some were originally in Tagalog, so I did my best to translate them into English so everyone can enjoy them.

A Quick Reality Check on "The Future"

We have a famous saying in the Philippines: “Ang taong hindi marunong lumingon sa pinanggalingan, hindi makararating sa paroroonan.” Basically, it means if you don’t look back at where you came from, you’ll never reach your destination.

But honestly? That’s not true. The only reason you won't reach your destination is if you don't have money for the fare! Because let’s face it: “Ang taong lumalakad, kadalasan ay walang pamasahe.” (The person walking usually just can't afford the bus ride). Am I right or am I right?

It's funny how our needs change, too. When you’re a student, all you care about is getting your pamasahe (fare). But once you finally get a job? All you really want is a good pa-massage!

5 Ways to Get Loaded

If you're trying to figure out how to get rich, there are pretty much only five ways to do it:

1. Be born into it. Some people are just lucky enough to be born with a golden spoon in their mouth. If that wasn't you, don't sweat it—we still have four more options.
2. Work your butt off. This one is tough, but it’s definitely rewarding to enjoy the fruits of your own labor. That said, if your salary is a joke, you might want to look at the next three.
3. Marry into money. Find a wealthy spouse. Bonus points if they’re really old and on their way out. Too dark? Moving on...
4. Win the lottery. Hey, it could happen! If luck hits, you’re an instant millionaire. Just make sure you actually have the cash to buy the ticket first.
5. Steal it. Look, this is a total last resort and I am definitely not recommending it. It’s illegal, stupid, and you will go to jail if you get caught. But hey, look on the bright side—free room and board, plus a daily "massage" from the guards!

Who’s the Real Boss at Home?

Have you ever wondered who actually holds the higher rank in a marriage? It all comes down to who handles what.

Naturally, the husband is the "General." Sounds powerful, right? He gets that title because he makes all the general decisions—like what’s for dinner, or who is going to do the dishes after.

The wife, on the other hand, is just a "Major." If you think that’s a step down, think again. She's the one making the major decisions all day, every day!

A 2-Second Japanese Lesson

Want to learn a little Japanese? It’s super easy.
How do you say "One more time" or "Give me another one" in Japanese?
"Isapane." (Get it? Isa pa, neh?)

Mother’s Milk

They always say breast milk is the absolute best thing for babies... and honestly, daddies seem to love it too!

How Fashion Changed Over the Years

Filipinos have always been known for being pretty conservative, especially with clothes. Back in the day, women wore skirts that went all the way down to their heels. Showing your legs in public was a massive no-no. Everything was covered up. In fact, a guy wasn't even supposed to see his girlfriend’s legs—if he did, he was basically locked into marrying her!

But as time went on, things changed, and those hemlines started creeping up:

• First came the "Maxi" skirt, which sat just below the knee.
• Then it hit the knee, and they called it the "Midi." (The guys definitely started paying attention here).
• As the years rolled by, it went above the knee with the "Mini," then the "Mini-Mini," and finally the "Micro-Mini."
• Eventually, the world welcomed the "Bikini."

So, what do you think is next for this millennium? It’s actually getting a lot simpler. There won’t be any bikinis left—just "Ini" (Tagalog for "This is it"—meaning totally naked)! So keep your eyes open.

In accounting, I think they call that "Adequate Disclosure."

The Secret Language of Skirt Slits

Did you know a skirt's slit says a lot about what a woman wants?

• If the slit is in the back, she’s saying: "Hey man, follow me."
• If the slit is on the side, she’s saying: "Hey man, walk with me."
• If the slit is in the front, she’s saying: "Hey man... catch me!"

Hilarious Answering Machine Messages

These are actual automated responses people have left on their real-life answering machines:

• "My wife and I can't come to the phone right now. But if you leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished."
• "Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you back soon. If you leave a 'sexy' message, I'll call you back even sooner!"

Consent is Everything

I’ll never forget how a criminal law professor defined a "Rape" case under Philippine law.
He said, "If a man has relations with a minor, with or without her consent, that's Rape. If he has relations with an adult woman without her consent, that's also Rape. However, if he has relations with an adult woman WITH her consent... well, then that's 'Merry Christmas!' And it feels so good, you'll want to celebrate it over and over again."

--ooOoo--

I hope you enjoyed reading this and feel free to share it with others.

 

Five Simple Rules to Be Happy

Originally inspired by reflections written in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, on February 14, 2011.

Every day gives us the same 24 hours. Yet despite the advances in technology, the conveniences of modern life, and our endless pursuit of success, many people still struggle to find happiness.

As an accountant, I often view life through the lens of numbers. Sometimes, numbers reveal truths that are easy to overlook.

Consider a typical day:

• 8 hours sleeping
• 8 hours working or studying
• 8 hours for everything else

In simple terms, only one-third of our day is truly available for family, friends, hobbies, personal growth, and the pursuit of happiness.

Now extend that calculation across a lifetime.

If a person lives to age 60, roughly:

• 20 years are spent sleeping,
• 20 years are spent working or studying,
• leaving about 20 years for everything that makes life meaningful.

Of course, this is only a simplified illustration. Real life is more complex. Commutes, responsibilities, obligations, and unexpected challenges consume additional time. The point is not the mathematics itself, but the realization that our time is finite and precious.

Once we understand that, we become more intentional about how we spend it.

Life's Detours Have a Purpose

Disappointments and setbacks are unavoidable.

We all experience moments when things do not go according to plan. A missed opportunity, a failed relationship, a business setback, or an unrealized dream can leave us discouraged.

Yet life's obstacles are often like speed bumps on a long journey. They slow us down, but they are not meant to stop us. The road eventually becomes smooth again.

When things do not happen the way we want, it may simply mean that something better is still unfolding. Challenges often teach us resilience, patience, wisdom, and gratitude.

Rather than dwelling on disappointments, we should learn from them and continue moving forward.

The Value of Love and Friendship

One of life's greatest blessings is finding people who genuinely care for us.

Love and friendship cannot be measured by perfection. Genuine relationships endure because people choose understanding over judgment, forgiveness over resentment, and acceptance over criticism.

Too often, we spend our time searching for the perfect person while overlooking the value of the people already in our lives.

True friendship grows stronger with time. Like a fine wine, it matures and becomes more meaningful with age. Old friends, trusted colleagues, devoted partners, and supportive family members are treasures that should never be taken for granted.

Life is short. Relationships are priceless.

The Five Simple Rules to Be Happy

Years ago, I came across a short piece of wisdom that has stayed with me ever since. Although the original author is unknown to me, its message remains timeless.

1. Free your heart from hatred.

Resentment weighs heavily on the soul. Forgiveness does not excuse wrongdoing, but it frees you from carrying unnecessary burdens.

2. Free your mind from worries.

Not everything is within your control. Focus your energy on what you can influence and let go of what you cannot.

3. Live simply.

Happiness is not always found in having more. Often, it is found in appreciating what is already enough.

4. Give more.

Be generous with your time, kindness, knowledge, and resources. The greatest rewards often come from helping others.

5. Expect less.

Many disappointments arise from unrealistic expectations. Gratitude grows when we learn to appreciate life's blessings instead of constantly demanding more.

These five principles may sound simple, yet they have the power to transform how we view life and interact with others.

Start Where You Are

We cannot rewrite the past.

The mistakes, regrets, failures, and missed opportunities are part of our story. However, they do not have to define our future.

No one can go back and create a brand-new beginning. But anyone can begin today and create a brand-new ending.

Every day presents an opportunity to choose gratitude over complaint, kindness over anger, and hope over despair.

As an accountant, allow me to express this final thought in financial terms:

Yesterday is a canceled check.
Tomorrow is a promissory note.
Today is the only cash you have.
Spend it wisely.

The greatest investment you will ever make is not in stocks, properties, or businesses. It is in how you spend the limited time you have been given.

Choose happiness. Choose gratitude. Choose to make today count.

Sincerely yours,

Benito L Mabeza, CPA

The Good Things About the Accounting Profession (2026 Edition)

 

Dear Readers,

Allow me to rewind a little. I still vividly remember attending a Career Guidance Seminar during my senior high school years. Sitting alongside my fellow graduating students, I listened to a panel of professionals—a lawyer, a doctor, a priest, a teacher, and an accountant, among others—who served as resource speakers. Each of them proudly championed their chosen field, eager to convince us to follow in their footsteps. 

As the presentations grew more passionate, a friendly debate erupted over whose line of work could claim the title of the oldest profession in the world. 

The surgeon stood up first, confidently pointing to the Book of Genesis. He explained that God caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep, removed one of his ribs, and fashioned it into Eve. "Therefore," he declared with a smile, "the very first recorded medical operation was surgery!" The graduating class erupted into enthusiastic applause. 

Immediately afterward, an agriculturalist rose to challenge the claim. "No, my friends! Before Adam and Eve were ever created, God first filled the earth with plants and animals. Therefore, agriculture is truly the first profession in the world." This statement drew even louder cheers, heightening the excitement in the room. 

Suddenly, a politician stood up and confidently interjected, "I beg to differ, ladies and gentlemen. It is neither agriculture nor surgery. It is politics! If you read the scriptures closely, you will note that even before creation, there was already a major debate in heaven regarding who would rule the universe. And that, my friends, is politics." A brief, amused silence followed; no one dared challenge his logic. 

Personally, I think all of those speakers were partly right and partly wrong—especially if we consider God as the ultimate professional and view the universe through the lens of creation. As for me, I am quite certain about who the first engineer and the first accountant were. In fact, they were one and the same person: Adam. He was the first engineer because he was responsible for the very first structural erection, and he was the first accountant because he made the first entry! 

Well... just kidding, of course. 

On a more serious note, it has always been clear to me that accounting is one of the most vital pillars of the business world. That fundamental truth is exactly why I pursued it. Regardless of their primary industry—whether they are doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs, entertainers, or public officials—nearly everyone will require the expertise of an accountant at some point. From preparing financial statements and analyzing business performance to ensuring regulatory compliance and managing complex tax reporting, every organization depends on sound financial guidance. 

What I appreciate most about our profession is that accountants safeguard the entire life cycle of an enterprise. When a company is established, we are among the first professionals called upon to set up the books and build the financial frameworks. Conversely, if a business must close or undergo liquidation, accountants are retained until the very end to close out the ledgers, settle obligations, and finalize the dissolution. 

In accounting, we are guided by clear standards and structured principles. For example, in inventory management, we frequently use the FIFO method: First In, First Out. Ironically, a similar rule applies to the professionals themselves. We are often the first to come into an organization, and the very last to leave. This presence from beginning to end gives accountants a unique and enduring degree of job security. 

I have also often reflected on why the execution of a professional career is called a "practice." Perhaps it is because true professionalism requires constant learning, refining, and a healthy dose of trial and error. Humorously speaking, even the Almighty could be said to have utilized a bit of trial and error when populating the earth. First, He created Adam alone. Then, realizing that it was not good for man to be solitary, He refined the design and created Eve. Fortunately for all of us, the second iteration was a spectacular upgrade. 

The true beauty of a professional practice is that we are granted the space to continuously learn, adapt, and grow through firsthand experience. And, of course, our clients value this expertise enough to compensate us for our services—even if those payments occasionally arrive a little later than expected! 

Let us commit to moving forward, taking decisive action, and remaining sharp in an ever-evolving corporate landscape. I am reminded of an old adage, the exact source of which escapes me: "A man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow will be uneducated the following day." 

The lesson is simple yet profound. True education does not culminate at graduation; learning is a lifelong journey. 

Thank you for dedicating your time to reading this piece. I hope it brought both a smile and some perspective, and I look forward to sharing more insights and experiences with you in future editions. 

Sincerely yours,

Benito L Mabeza, CPA