Showing posts with label buhay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label buhay. Show all posts

Thursday, May 24, 2012

ANG BUHAY NGA NAMAN


I would like to publish this article I wrote in my previous Taglish journal "Ang Buhay Nga Naman" and practice my writing skills sa wikang Pilipino.   

Hi! Magandang araw po mga Kabayan! Ang edition po na ito ay galing sa aking tagalized column dati.



Let’s test your IQ and please try to answer bago mo silipin ang tamang sagot sa dakong hulihan.


T-1 Ano ang pagkakapareho ng isang "Hari" at ng "Meterstick"?
T-2. Ano ang matatagpuan mo sa gitna ng “Australia at America”?
T-3. Ano ang pagkakapareho ng “Island” at ng letter “T”.
T-4. Ano naman ang mga letters na di mo matatagpuan sa Alphabet?


More Questions Pa:
T –  Ano ang pagkaka-iba ng “parachute” at ng “condom”?
S – Ang parachute pag nabutas “PATAY” kang bata ka! Samantala ang condom pag nabutas “BUHAY” kang bata ka!

T – Ano naman ang similarity ng 'Asphalted road' at ng isang 'Babae'?
S – Pareho po silang 'Slippery” when WET! Ay bastos! 

Paano Pauwiin si Mister?  I-text mo!

Meron isang businessman na mahilig mag-extend tuwing may business trip at lagi  na lang may excuses.

The businessman texts his wife: “MOMMY CAN’T COME HOME YET STILL SHOPPING
And the wife texts back: "DADDY PLS COME BACK AM SELLING WHAT UR SHOPPING
So uwi agad si Mister. Bakit kaya? Hulaan mo na lang.

Oi! Punta Tayo sa Hanoi!

Alam ninyo ba doon pala sa Hanoi 15% ng mga teenagers sexually active na! At halos 5% daw naman ng mga babaeng teenagers ay nabubuntis bago mag 18! Kaya tinanong ko yong Vietnamese friend ko bakit kaya? Sabi niya  kasi daw malamig sa Hanoi at wala gano magawa. So they just "DO IT"! “Troi Oi!”

Oy maaasign yata ako don soon!


Ang Sagot sa IQ Test
T-1 Pareho silang "RULER".
T-2 Eh di letter “R”.
T-3 Pareho silang nasa gitna ng "WATER".
T-4 Eh yon mga "letters sa Post Office". At saka meron pa pa yong letter para sa mahal ko.

O nakuha mo ba?




Sige hanggang sa muli po at sana nagustuhan ninyo ito. Babalik po ako for more. Pramis!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

PRAY WHEN YOU NEED HELP

26 February 2011, Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam. This time, I would like to share a story I have written in the past and lifted from my previous Taglish [mixed Tagalog & English] Journal entitled “Ang Buhay nga Naman” [“Oh it’s Life” in English].

This was originally written in Tagalog (the language from which the Filipino national language is based) when I was in high school but was not published as it was rejected by the editor of our school organ then. Well, here is the English translation of the story…


Original Title:  “ANG BABOY NI JUAN” [The Juan’s Pig Story]

It was rainy season in the Philippines and time for the expected devastation from the storms and typhoons; I always remember this story of our neighbour. 

One day a super typhoon hit the Bicol Region and consequently the pig’s cage of our neighbour, Juan, was destroyed and his domesticated pig got lost.

The next day, after the weather calmed down, Juan immediately searched for his lost pig, asking the neighbours on his way. But some time had passed and he still couldn’t find his pig. He passed by the Chapel and there he prayed. "Virgin Mary, please help me find my lost pig."

Thereafter, he continued the search. But it was already late in the afternoon and no sign of his pig. "Oh what a Shit Pig!" he said in dismay and gradually lost hope. Once again, he returned to the chapel and prayed. This time he prayed: "Virgin Mary if I find my lost pig, I will sell it and donate the proceeds to the Chapel.”, and then he humbly headed out of the Chapel.

As he was walking just outside the Chapel, lo and behold, his lost pig appeared just in front of him. He was so happy then, but immediately remembered what he has just promised to the Virgin Mary.

He took the pig home. His son welcomed him, “Oh! Father you found our pig.” Juan replied: “Yes, my son but it’s not ours anymore. I have just committed that (pig) to the Virgin Mary; I will sell the pig and donate the sales proceeds to the Chapel. By the way, I’m going to sell our cat too.”

The son was so surprised and wondered. "Who would buy that cat?" the son murmured (as there are a lot of stray cats in Bicol and definitely cats are not saleable).

Hauling the pig and cradled the cat, Juan peddled them to the neighbourhood market place. He shouted "Pig for sale!"

A buyer asked: "How much?", "Oh it’s cheap", Juan replied, "Only Five Pesos (P5.00)” [which is equivalent to US twenty five cent only at that time]. “Ok”, the buyer said, thinking this seller must be idiot! "What just five pesos?" reconfirmed the buyer. "Yes, but on one condition”, Juan replied. “What's that?” questioned the buyer. “You have to buy my cat also", Juan replied and the Buyer asked again "So how much?", "One thousand Pesos (P1,000.00).” [about US$50.00 that time], replied Juan. As the buyer thought it’s a good deal he said: “Oh, okay I take them all." They closed the deal and paid out.

True to his promise, Juan went back to the Chapel, prayed and thanked the Virgin Mary, "Thank you very much Virgin Mary for helping me. Here is Five Pesos for you."

(Moral of the story, pray and your prayer will surely be answered, but never break your promise.)

Until next time, I hope you enjoyed reading. 


BLMabeza is originally from the Bicol Region where most of the storms and typhoons that hit the Philippines land fall.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

The Wonderful World of Numbers & Figures


1st Edition: 1st December 2010, Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam. It gives me great pleasure to be able to write again and share my thoughts with you. I used to write my other Taglish [mixed Tagalog & English] Journal entitled “Ang Buhay nga Naman.” [“Oh it’s Life” in English] but has stopped for quite some time due to my hectic schedule.

For nearly twenty years I have been engaged in the Accounting profession and naturally deal with numbers and figures; hence the title of this blog. We, professionals are affected by a lot of challenges, not only from work but also the happenings in the business community, the global economic crisis, global warning, etc. However it is not a reason to give up. One has to move and take action, as you know “good things come to those who wait, but not to those who wait too late”. 

Thus, here am I again to share with you my thoughts…


The Good Things about the Accounting Profession

Allow me to rewind; I still remember well when during my senior high school I attended the Career Guidance Seminar, joined by my fellows in the graduating class and several professionals, who served as resource persons, i.e. lawyer, doctor, priest, teacher, accountant and others; all of whom trying to convince us to follow their suit.

They (professionals) are all proud of their professions and even a few of them claimed that theirs is the first profession in the world. The Surgeon rose and claimed that Surgery is the first profession in world. Because according to him and referring to the Bible:  Eve was created by God by causing Adam to fall into a deep sleep and took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which God had taken from Adam, was made into a woman, Eve.  And therefore Surgery is the first profession in the world, which was applauded by the graduating class.

Immediately another professional stood up, “No my friends it’s not Surgery, but Agriculture that is the first profession in the World. You have to know that before Adam and Eve were created, God created flora and fauna first. So Agriculture is the first profession in the world!” This got a greater applause and started to create an excitement in the air.

All of the sudden, the Politician stood up and claimed: “Sorry, my dear ladies and gentlemen, it’s neither Agriculture nor Surgery that is the first profession in the world but Politics.” You are all referring to the Bible, and if you will read closely, you will note that even before creation there was already a debate in the Heaven, who will eventually rule our World.  And that’s politics, so Politics is the first profession in the world.” It was a silence that followed then and no other claim followed.

Well, I would say those professionals’ claims were partly wrong and correct. Only if you would consider God, as the greatest professional, and that you would believe in creation rather than evolution.

As for me, I am quite sure as to who were the first Engineer, as well as, the first Accountant in the world. The first Engineer and Accountant is only one person and it was Adam.  As the first Engineer he has the first erection and as the first Accountant he made only the first entry.

Well… kidding aside, it seems to me that the Accounting profession is essential in the business world, that’s why I pursued it. All professionals, be it a doctor, lawyer, businessman, actor and actress would definitely need the services of an Accountant; the Accountants have to prepare the Profit & Loss Statements and Income Tax Returns of these other professionals. Hence all types of businesses must have an Accountant.

As an Accountant we have to follow and are governed by standards and principles, for example when it comes to Inventory and Asset Management; we have the so called “FIFO” or first in – first out.  But what I like most is when it comes to employment, the Accountants are one of the first in and the last to be out. When a business entity is opened Accountants are hired to open the books and if for any reason the business were to shut down or goes on liquidation, still the Accountants would be retained to close the books and liquidate. Thus, an Accountant is always there – from the beginning to end. Hence, I could say at least Accountants are assured of a job. Would you agree with us?

I encountered this trivial question and wonder why the exercise by professionals of their respective professions is called a “Practice”.  Why practice? Is it because of “trial and error” sometimes, if not all the time?  As you could see, even God, whom I consider the greatest professional of all, also had practiced trial and error, when creating mankind.  First he created Adam alone, and realized the man is lonely, hence created Eve after, the woman, I suppose for us all  to be happy.

But what is good in our practice of our professions, is that the Client pays our fees, even if in some cases late.

As parting words for my first edition, let us all move on, take action; and don’t forget to keep learning and stay competitive.  There is a saying, though I can’t remember where it came from, saying: “A man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow will be uneducated the following day.”

I hope you enjoyed reading this and I will be back to write more…

B L Mabeza is a Certified Public Accountant registered in the Philippines.